English movies you should never translate to TAGALOG

Got this funny email from my Tatay. The ones that made me laugh out loud the most are in red.

1. Black Hawk Down – Ibong Maitim sa Ibaba
2. Dead Man’s Chest – Dodo ng Patay
3. I Know What You Did Last Summer – Uyy… aminin!
4. Love, Actually – Sa Totoo lang, Pag-ibig
5. Million Dollar Baby – 50 Milliong Pisong Sanggol (it depends on the exchange rate of the country)
6. The Blair Witch Project – Ang Proyekto ng Bruhang si Blair
7. Mary Poppins – Si Mariang may Putok
8. Snakes on a Plane – Nag-ahasan sa Ere
9. The Postman Always Rings Twice – Ang Kartero kapag Dumutdot laging Dalawang Beses
10. Sum of all Fears – Takot mo, Takot ko, Takot Nating Lahat
11. Swordfish – Talakitok
12. Pretty Woman – Ganda ng Lola mo
13. Robin Hood, Men in Tights – Si Robin Hood at ang mga Felix Bakat
14. Four Weddings and a Funeral – Kahit 4 na Beses ka pang Magpakasal, Mamamatay ka rin
15. The Good, The Bad and the Ugly – Ako, Ikaw, Kayong Lahat
16. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone – Adik si Harry, Tumira ng Shabu
17. Click – Isang Pindot ka Lang
18. Brokeback Mountain – May Nawasak sa Likod ng Bundok ng Tralala / Bumigay sa Bundok
19. The Day of the Dead – Ayaw Tumayo (ng mga patay)
20. Waterworld – Basang-basa
21. There’s Something about Mary – May Kwan sa Ano ni Maria
22. Employee of the Month – Ang Sipsip
23. Resident Evil – Ang Biyenan
24. Kill Bill – Kilitiin sa Bilbil
25. The Grudge – Lintik lang ang Walang Ganti
26. Nightmare Before Christmas – Binangungot sa Noche Buena
27. Never been Kissed – Pangit Kasi
28. Gone in 60 Seconds – 1 Round, Tulog
29. The Fast and the Furious – Ang bitin, Galit
30. Too Fast, Too Furious – Kapag Sobrang Bitin, Sobrang Galit
31. Dude, Where’s My Car – Dong, Anong Level Ulit tayo Nag-park?
32. Beauty and the Beast – Ang Asawa ko at ang Nanay nya
33. The Lord of the Rings – Ang Alahero

~ by Michelle on August 28, 2007.